Long Awaited Band Tour Post (words)

I started writing this post back in November but did not have time to finish it. So, here is the exciting band tour...

You know you are a colorguard director when...?

How do you tell that a colorguard director is exhausted after a 26 hour bus ride and a 5-6 day tour with the marching band kiddos?

When...

~receiving a joyous 2nd place in the division (and a mighty big trophy) and high colorguard in the smallest and lowest division

~being told I am crazy for enduring a second year of band tour with my kiddos is not a shocking statement...and you nod your head in agreement

~realizing that if you had been promoted to the next division you would received 3rd place (out of 9 bands)

~understanding that every band is judged the same and therefore means your colorguard beat a 4A (second highest division) colorguard

~touring San Francicso, Lodi, Elko and Reno are on the agenda

~assisting in taking care of 21 teenagers ranging in age from 14-18 becomes exciting (I know...I am a bit crazy)

~sleeping a maximum of 4 hours each night is a HUGE blessing

~getting the kiddos on the bus, through all of tour and off the bus in one piece proves to be a life success

~exhaustion hits the teenage boys (who never really stop for anything)

~Dr. Pepper is your saving grace

~a four hour rehearsal two days in a row without complaining kids is heavenly and a once in a lifetime opportunity

~you slept through chaperone check and your students had to let the band director know that they "have the chaperone and she is safe!"

~being called "Mommy Goose" by the senior Drum Major is a sign of respect

~calling my kids "my little ducklings" is a sign of love from me

~checking in my kids every five minutes causes them to roll their eyes because I am "acting like a parent"

~starting everyday at 5:30am and not getting to bed until at least 12:30am (the next day) is the second sign of love

~touring Alcatraz and teasing the kids about leaving them their if they behave poorly is NOT considered child abuse

~watching 18 year old tough boys, known as drummers, melt at the sight of a fluffy baby snow leopard and cry when the zoo sign says the tigers are highly endangered and rapidly disappearing

~kicking the kids butts when the staff (including me) and chaperones beat the kids (by a whole lot) in laser tag and bowling

~explaining to the hotel manager that taping the kids into their room simply means to put tape on their doors so we know who broke the rules is not what the hotel manager thought (he was thinking child abuse for sure...)

~hearing the hotel manager think we literally tape the kids to their beds confuses me (I don't think scotch tape would hold up).

~realizing you are not as good at kickball as you thought you were turns into being upstaged by ALL 21 kids

~eating fast food, tour food and all-you-can-eat buffets are not sounding pleasant at the moment

~bribing the drumline with eight 24 packs of caffeinated soda if they give us (the staff) the best rehearsals and performance seems like no big deal (there are only nine of them on the line...one is a girl who hates soda)

~the kids post on facebook how much fun they had, how worn out they are and how excited they are for next years marching band endeavors

Exhausting band tour? You bet. Successful trip? I say yes!

Now, to tackle mountains of homework and catch up on some sleep.

Oh Boy

I realize I have not updated in quite sometime (August?). I have been super busy. I will leave you with a preview of what I plan to update on before the year is out. So, in no particular order here are some upcoming topics I plan to blog about:

-My students amazing band tour (maybe two? One in just words and one in pictures?)
-My failed attempts at NaNoWriMo (if you don't know what that is I will explain later)
-My plans for my 25th year of life
-Projects I have been completing at work
-A politic/religion post (I have actually already started this but it is so long it is taking forever to complete)
-Some of my goals for 2013
-Project updates
-A book review or two
-BIG ideas I have

I think I could go on but these are some of the posts I either have started and haven't had time to finish or plan on posting so very soon. Bear with me.

Last Day in Washington

Tonight is the last night I am in Washington. Boo. However, I believe this trip was a success! I needed time away from everything to just relax and have fun! I would say lots of swimming, watching movies, going shopping, viewing the Snowqualmie Falls and Train Museum, making and eating blueberry pie and peach cobbler, picking blueberries, reading and relaxing are my idea of a vacation! I just wish I could stay a little longer.

I sense things will change from here on out. Grandpa is slowing way down. I fear he will not make it past a year, or, if he does, he will not have a clear memory of some of his Grandchildren 9such as those of us who live in another State). I do want to come back next year since I love the Northwest so much! Aside from a few scorching hot days, the weather was pleasant! I want the 70 degree weather to come to Utah and stay for a while! I may need to have an extra big hug ready for Grandpa in case I am unable to do so in the future.

I will return to Washington and visit Oregon soon!

Exhaustingly Sucessful Day pt. 2

As you can tell, today is Sunday, deemed as the day of rest for many of the religious variety. Yesterday (and part of today) is the basis for my blog title.

Last week after our successful yard sale, it was decided to have our multi-family yard sale again only this time have it on Friday and Saturday for only four hours each day (8am-1pm). Another success for all of us. This was actually a little bit better than the previous weekend because we weren't sitting out in the yucky heat for several hours (in case you are wondering we are in the high 90's and will be in triple digits this upcoming week...yuck). This weekend, Kory's father brought over some toy cars and we slashed prices left and right just to get rid of everything. This helped a lot. Last I heard, over the three days we had the sale we came close to, or made over $800. Not a bad haul. Most of my sales were in clothing...and I am still selling some at a store known as Trendy Exchange (they give you cash for clothes they want to sell in their store). I feel as though I have lighted a BIG load by getting rid of everything. Anything that did not sell, we took to Goodwill and dropped it off. We all agreed, none of it was going back into the house!

After we tallied up everyone's total, I went to go take a test. It was not necessarily difficult, just time consuming. I did fairly well, scoring high on the multiple choice portion. I am pretty confident about the written part but I won't know until tomorrow how I did!

I may post again today...maybe not. I want to show some before and after pictures of my room, but I am not 100% confident it will get done tonight.

Exhaustingly Successful Day...

I really don't understand how yard sales can make someone so exhausted. Initially I was mentally exhausted and thought that I could go the rest of the day with regular Saturday evening plans. Then I woke up to dinner being ready. Yes, the yard sell ended at 4pm, money was counted and distributed and I sat down at about 5:30pm. I woke up at about 6pm (ish) so really only a 30 minute nap, but the fact that I slept means I was (and currently am) much more physically exhausted than I thought. I think everyone is...even my dad who did not man the stations but did in fact provide fans on a 90+ degree day, babysat the little one (my niece), got out all the lunch products, set up the canopies (and help break down the yard sale) and check on us occasionally! My mom worked all day so she wasn't there but it is exhausting preparing for such endeavor and then heading to a long day at work to come home and help finish the last remaining details of the yard sale are just as exhausting. Note that it was a MASSIVE sale...as in multifamily...literally. My family, my sister's in-laws and a neighbor all had contributed to this sale. We sold a whole of items but still have a lot more to go. Which is why we are going to have another yard sale on Friday and Saturday this next weekend! To let you know how successful this yard sale was without going into too many details, the total profit all three families made combined was over $400 and that was for eight hours. Again, we still have so much more stuff to sell, but all-in-all a rather successful day!

To give you an idea of how and why I found the garage sale successful, I will give you some thoughts to ponder. Going into the garage sale I for sure had seven of those printer paper boxes of clothing and a large box (I am guessing at least an 8 x 4 x 4 box of clothing) that I had ready to be put out into the yard sale last night. I woke up at 5am this morning to over a few things in the basement and find two ore paper boxes worth of clothing to put out. I am pretty sure of the nine paper boxes and one big box (at least) I sold about 65% of those items of clothing and I still have more to contribute to next weekends yard sale! I still have so much more to do and go through but I am happy with the results and hope to have as good, if not better, results next weekend *crosses fingers* I still have a lot more work to do and an anticipating more late nights this week, but all for the better!

Now, I will be showering and going to bed! I will post more tomorrow!

My Hope for the Young Men in the World

I know Father's Day was Sunday but in the spirit of celebrating good men I feel I should tell this story.

On Saturday, I visited my mom at her clinic. As I was leaving there was a man and a kid walking out of the kidney center. I assume they were related based off of the way they interacted. Since the clinic my mom is employed in sits on the second floor along with the kidney center, the kid, the older man and I proceed to the elevator. I got in first and hit the button to get to the first floor. The man and the kid walked in too. Now, I believe this kid was probably closer to the teenager range. He couldn't be any younger than 8 but I was guessing somewhere between 10 and 13 years of age. Also, I hate stereotyping but he was of some ethnic group that I believe to be a minority. Which is why I think this story is awesome.

We reached the first floor and the elevator open. The older man walked out first leaving me and the kid in the elevator. The kid motioned for me to go first. I liked the gesture and said thank you. What happened next made my day. The kids ran as fast as he could to the sliding doors and stepped in front of me. I was curious as to why he would do such a thing. He also put a hand up to the older man and said "I thought Dad said 'ladies first.' He turned to me and gestured for me to go before him.  I was impressed. Then, when we were all out in the parking lot he opens the door of a mini-van waiting for the two of them. He helped this older man into the first seat of the car, then ran to the back and said "no I'll sit in the back." Before the door shut I see a much younger girl (I am assuming a younger sister) sitting in the middle row of the mini van.

Now, I give this story because to me, it restores my faith in the male gender. Now, not all guys are bad and even women have their flaws. But growing up outside of Utah I had friends with divorced parents, fathers (and even the occasional mother) not present or not living a psychologically good lifestyle (for the kids at least...many had a much younger mistress or something along those lines) I was pleased to see this family attempting to make a young man out of this boy! I believe the first step to raising a good man is to make sure he respects women and sees women be respected. The fact that his father taught him to be kind enough to let the women he encounter feel respected, whether it was a complete stranger or his baby sister, gives me hope for the men in the world. My hats off to the men trying their absolute best to raise honorable respectable young men.

It was a small act and seemingly insignificant but I believe something this small can make a huge difference in this young man's life.

I May Be Biased...

I may be a bit biased but my niece is the most gorgeous and cutest little munchkin in the world. I was finally able to get the photos from her birthday uploaded to my computer without much of a glitch. I was looking at the pictures from her birthday and pictures I have when she was a wee little thing of four days old (she was four days old when I got to first hold her)! So, here are some birthday pictures (I won't post too many, that is for my sister to do)!

I think Papa (Kory's Dad) had too much fun putting balloons in baby girl's hair! They would stick and then she would looking for a way to grab them with very little success.

 She is such a happy (and super cute) one year old!

 These are the cupcakes Michele made for her on her birthday!

 Admiring grandma and grandpa's present!

After baby girl took a look at my present. I hope she loves it for years to come. The little sock money is super cute!

Attempting to crawl over Auntie Kali's legs (Kali is Kory's sister).

I would say it was an overall successful day for everyone. We are happy baby girl had a nap before all the festivities or we would have had a cranky pants on our hands. We even got to skype family in Washing ton to say hi. I think they were more interested in the baby than us!

Why I Love, and Hate, the First Day of Term

As is obvious, I am currently on a break in between classes for school. I still have one more class before I head off to work. Now, I am looking through courses for Summer and Fall. Why? Because I want to maximize my work schedule while getting all the requirements that I need for my major. I am on the waitlist for a required class but if I go to it then my schedule becomes full all day Monday and Wedenesday leaving me with Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays to work most of the day (I would go until 9:45am on Fridays and then head off to work from about 10am-5pm). I am trying to work it out so that some of my classes are in the evenings that way I can have some in the morning, work, some in the evenings and then do homework! One of the classes I need, a Chemistry class, is everyday from 11am-12:50pm, except for Fridays. It would just be for the first block, meaning once June 22nd hit, I could go back to working most days as all day! This is why I love, and hate the first day of school. I go to classes, figure out which teacher(s) could benefit me and my learning, style, re-arrange my schedule as needed, meet with advisers, re-work plans, finalize my work schedule for that block of time and still have some time for my social life and for myself!

I am happy to report that my manager at work has said the company is willing to work with my school schedule because when I get to work, I work hard and know exactly what to do. He also understands that I am attempting to knock out as many credits as possible so that in the fall, I can be of the utmost value to the company. So far, with the schedule I have in mind this summer, I can be at work everyday for fall term by 11:30am! Now, if I spread everything out and try to maximize my work schedule for the summer then in the fall, I am at work at 11:30am for only a few of the days of the week. Oh decisions. It is time for me to go check out a few more things and get some school stuff in order, but I had to vent my frustration and my first day back at school excitement or I would not have been able to focus for my next class.

I will keep everyone updated regarding my class schedule for the next little while.

Baby Birthdays and Great Graduations!

I have been attempting to upload pictures for the past hour, but my computer is being stupid at the moment, so sadly the pictures will have to wait. Baby girl was so happy at the party! We had food, did birthday cupcakes (my family is not a huge cake family) and had lots of fun being together. Baby girl loved her gifts. I got her the purple sock monkey as noted on the previous post. I hope she can enjoy it for years to come!

I find it hard believe that it has been a year since her surprise birth (I say surprise simply because she came 5 weeks prior to her due date of June 7th). I remember how the events played out. I had been in Oregon helping my mom because she was having ankle surgery and my Dad was in Malaysia at the time. My mom had ankle surgery on Wednesday. Friday morning at around 7am the phone rang. My parents had caller ID at the time and it would usually tell my parents which kid was calling. When the phone rang however, the caller ID simply said "Utah number." I answered it wondering what was going on and was surprised to hear Michele's voice on the other end. She asked for mom so I handed Mom the phone. My mom and Michele briefly talked but I figured from the conversation something was happening! I heard the words "baby" and "today." It was time. Baby was arriving earlier than expected. While this was happening, I went to my mom's computer to pull up Skype and attempt to call Dad on the other side of the world. The only times we could call were early in the morning or later in the evenings due to the time difference, although something tells me if we had to wake him up to tell him his grandbaby was making her appearance soon, he wouldn't have been too angry. I made to attempts to Skype with no success, so instead I typed "The moment you get this message, please get on Skype. It is vitally important." I knew Dad would be up soon, so I wrote out the message and made sure he saw it by hitting enter a few times so the message would repeat itself.

While that was happening Mom had already notified the Cummings and Passmore's of a new addition and was asking for assistance to go downstairs. I got everything prepared to help her get down the stairs in her bulky cast when I heard the Skype on Mom's computer ringing. Dad was on the other line! I ran downstairs to answer and told him he had to wait while I got Mom into her chair for the day! Once she was settled Mom informed Dad that baby girl was on her way! We were all anxious and waiting for the news that baby girl was here safe and sound and healthy. Our biggest concern was how early she was. We kept wondering if her early timing would land her in the NICU. If so, that was another medical concern our families would be facing along with her club feet. I went to the high school that day to visit some former teachers and friends. When I got home from the visit, Mom informed me that baby girl arrived at 4pm that day. Pictures were abundant on facebook and we were constantly making calls that day!

I didn't get to physically see and hold baby girl until Tuesday. I was scheduled to land in Salt Lake City Sunday evening and was told that Michele and Kory wanted time with their new little one! Kory went back to work on Tuesday. I received a call from my mom stating it was time for me to go to Michele's. Apparently she was having some difficulties and needed an extra hand. While sister napped, I spent the whole time just holding baby girl and admiring her tiny self (she weighed in at 5 lbs. 11 oz. and could fit comfortably from the crease of my elbow to my wrist). Today, we still swoon over her and smother her with hugs, cuddles and kisses galore! Today she was excited for new toys and to be loved on even more by friends and family! I love you baby girl! Here's to another wonderful year with you!

Another big event occurred this weekend that has both the Cummings and Sekaquaptewa's extending the celebrations! Baby girl's father, Kory, graduated with his Master's in School Counseling. It was awesome to see he walk across the stage and have his hard work pay off!

Again, pictures are forthcoming from both events! What an eventful weekend. Now, off to bed. I start summer term of school tomorrow and want to be well rested!

Punk Rock and Chick Flicks Pt. 2

Yes, this is a continuation of the blog I made from yesterday (haha...30 Seconds to Mars reference...they made a music video for their song "From Yesterday" off of their A Beautiful Lie Album). Yesterday's blog talked of some inspiration and potential projects occurring in the future. I figured I would write a blog about one or two of these projects I intend on completing. One of the main projects I am doing will benefit the rest of my projects (or so I hope).

I am titling this BIG project of mine Spring Cleaning. Now, I know certain people will continue to inform me of my cleaning and organizing projects going by the wayside (*cough* Hannah *cough*) but I have some motivation and have a goal to fulfill. Plus, as mentioned, I have several other projects in mind and need the space to complete said projects. Also, my family is having a massive garage sale in June and I plan on utilizing the garage sale to my advantage. I think my Mom and sister pointed out that I could easily make $100 off of the clothes I own alone. I also want to go through everything and then post pictures of the journey of moving permanently to Utah. I am having a difficult time getting the first pictures of my bedroom off my phone but I can give everyone a picture of the mayhem that comes with deep cleaning and organizing...

 This is what happens when you go through everything...it gets worse before it gets better.

 The hallway right outside of my bedroom. The box has clothes and various other items I am planning on getting rid of. The laundry basket has clean towel waiting to be put in the linen closet behind this mess and the bins are the empty bins I have gone through.

Part of the storage room in the basement. More stuff to go through and get rid of.

 ...and more of the storage room and yet more to get rid of.

 This is some stuff that was in my car but has since been moved to my bedroom to get cleaned out. Luckily most of it was trash so I just opened up the trash bag and dumped it all in.

 The area I have spent the time time organizing. It is a bit cleaner now...

Probably the cleanest spot in my bedroom (although not very organized...yet).

So, needless to say I have quite a lot to do in such a small amount of time but I think the end result will be rewarding. I will have all my books safe and sound in one place, my closet will be less crowded (picture of my closet will come later), and I will be happy and relieved to have my bedroom done. Afterwards, I can decorate to my hearts content...and with my mild pinterest addiction I may be doing more and more projects for my room this summer!

Once I get my room completed, next thing on my spring cleaning list is the bathroom. I don't get a lot of room in the bathroom so I need to utilize what little space I have with it. I am thinking of moving the cleaning supplies to the linen closet in the hallway and that way I have more room!

Now, on to some more of my inspirations that will lead into some of the projects to be revealed later! I found my art supplies while going through some boxes and I am excited to say that my oil pastels are still intact! Can you say art project?! I am excited!

Now, I will leave you with a hint about tomorrow's blog because it is going to be exciting!...

That is all you are getting for now!

Good night!

Punk Rock and Chick Flicks!

After work I felt very exhausted (as I am sitting down now I can feel exhaustion creeping up on me). I had plans to go with Victoria to dinner and a movie at the dollar theatre (okay, so the weekend rate is $2 but better than the usual $8 price at a regular theatre). After some yummy Cafe Rio we went and saw the movie The Vow. I cried like a baby in that movie. Then on the way home, I rolled down the windows of my car and played 30 Seconds to Mars A Beautiful Lie album. These two unlikely genres got me thinking about a lot of things.

1) In the movie, the characters talk of following your heart and taking risks.

2) 30 Seconds to Mars always makes the quote "be outside of your comfort zone or you will never be able to create something amazing.

So, the drive home, I thought of new creative projects to work on. Stay tuned!

Motivation? We Shall See...

I woke up this morning feeling refreshed and ready to go...at 5am! I know, strange since I didn't finish my shower and get to bed until about 1am (back to the surviving off of 4-5 hours of sleep deal again?). However, I knew I would be exhausted in the middle of work so I fought to urge to get up and do something, but now I am wondering if I should have spend that time exercising. I already posted my goal of hitting a 1k in under seven minutes (if possible) but I want to have a more consistant exercise plan. So, I have decided to come up with a reward system. I weighed myself this morning. Now, for my height I am not "fat" per say but I am on the higher end of the weight scale.

I am going to try and think of a reward by tomorrow so I have something to work towards!

For now I will sleep!

Neverending Work

I finally finished my graduation plan...well, most of it. I have an assignment from my counselor to have some back up options in case things go wrong, such as not getting a high enough grade or finding it is not available for the planned term. That, though, will come later. I have BIG goals and plans for myself and my education! But all that will reveal itself in due time! I have a plan for a blog involving all that shenanigans!

Even though I have had a rather productive evening, I still have a lot of work to do over the next few days. My goal is to have my room relatively cleaned and everything sorted by Saturday evening (Sunday morning at the earliest). I say relatively because I know it will not be to where I had planned to have it for a while. But I would like it presentable. I am amazed though at how much junk I didn't need. I have already gone through my recycle box four times (I have a box under my desk that I use for recycling, usually paper). I have gone through several trash bags and have a feeling the upcoming garage sale could present a nice bit of money for me! Here's to hoping! It just feels like there is always work to be done. On my to-do list, right after cleaning my room (and sorting and organizing) I have the phrase "thoroughly clean the bathroom" listed. This means to find ways to hide everything on the counter and sink since I probably have one of the smaller bathrooms in the house and share it with the guest bedroom and any potential guest.

So, the work is never ending, but at least I have a few things completed! Now, here is to hoping things turn out better! I plan on giving an update tomorrow about what was accomplished. Maybe this time I will actually do some exercising and get myself into shape!

I think some me time is calling! Good night!

No Distress Calls Here...Right?

Happy May Day everyone!

It is weird to think that the 2012 year is a quarter of the way completed. I have been extremely busy this last week.

I finished finals on Wednesday and have spent the time working 8:30am-5pm at Craft Supplies. I have been wokring those hours everyday since that time and always come home tired. Plus, I have had some deadlines to keep and have been up late many nights to fulfill said deadlines (I know what all are thinking...why am I up so stinking late now writing in my blog and not going to bed?). I guess that is where I am in my life at the moment though. I have a feeling that for a while I will be tired. I will drag myself out of bed and face the day of school and work, staying up late cleaning, doing homework, and all sorts of crazy stuff and be grateful I have a bed to sleep on during those times...and I don't think anything will let up for a while.

Something that I have been doing recently is generating a grauation plan. At the moment it just looks very daunting to me. Even if I keep my credit load to 12 credits, I have tough classes a head of me. I have huge goals and BIG plans but I tell you, it is going to be a long haul.

I have had time to think about life. I was unable to sleep for a 2 hour span between the hours of 2am and 4am, but it was a productive 2 hours of  not sleeping. I realized that I may never get adequate sleep, just, what I call survival sleep from here on out. I am amazed when people tell me that got 7 hours of sleep. I can generally function relatively normal on 4-5 hours of sleep. Some nights I am not so lucky to even get 4 hours. I have a mind that thinks and processes best when I am just laying down. I thin some of my dreams are the product of my brain attempting to sort out all kind of information. A few nights ago, I had an awful nightmare that I had failed out of school and lost sight of my goals...but within the nightmare some revelations came about that I do not intend to share at the moment. These were things I had been contemplating for a while and made some amazing realizations. So, I guess not all of the dream was bad. Anyways, I was last night for two hours and made another realization that even when I do get down time (like now), I feel a need to remain busy. My down time rarely lasts long. Maybe, I should take some advice and spend one of these summer Saturdays reading a book outside and soaking up the sun! I know that I will have some opportunities to go home early from work and school...maybe I will go home and find time for my niece this summer...just the two of us in the backyard on a nice summer day! Even when I graduate, I will still be working, unless by some miracle I marry a VERY wealthy man, or being a mom to someone (my kids or assisting in some way to the rearing of other children...or even people...more on that philosophy later). I am not making sense anymore but it makes sense to me. Maybe it is a sign to go to bed soon?

I promised in the last blog (or two) to talk of my exercise progress. Funny it should be mentioned, simply due to the fact that the Sunday School lesson at church was on Provident Living and included a challenge to improve our physical health throught proper diet and exercise. Does walking at work count? Because I do. I walk up and down aisles to pick orders and stock items. I think it counts! Anywho, the other day I timed myself for a 1k run (I know...only running 0.62 miles is not impressive, but I have start somewhere, right?). According to my iPod I am averaging a 12 minute mile, which I am not happy about I would love 10 minutes or less. My time for my first 1k was 7 minutes and 57 seconds. I plan on being in the 6 minute range by mid-May *crosses fingers.*

Okay, now it is definitely time for bed. I will catch you all later!

P.S. Can I just say, having a former student of mine text me after she read previous blog about my woes with colorguard made my day! She sent a great one too and I still have it!

Different Sources of Inspiration

I promise today is not a teen drama on mTV inspiration day. I woke up to the Sunday coming through my window and it made me happy. I do love rain. It reminds me of Oregon. However, while I was driving to a meeting today, I noticed that everything was turning green and flowers (and weeds) are starting to bloom. I was excited! Spring is around the corner. Now, this raises the question...is the snow gone for good? Probably not but I can hope right?

So, while driving I turned off the music and just watched my surroundings. I felt as though Spring is one of those renewal seasons. Everything is new and fresh. I feel as though that is where my life is going. I am going into the end of term, I have a job, I have many plans for life and many goals that I have set within the last few days.

I have had issues with how I look for a while. I recently put on a bit more weight than I would like and have decided, with the recent shift in weather, I may start to go running. I am lucky that my iPod has a mile tracker! I just updated all my music and plan to start an exercise program. In fact tomorrow I will start tracking everything on my blog too! I have a pretty big goal in mind, but I don't want to say anything about it yet...some of you may guess it relatively quickly but for those who don't I will let you in on the secret tomorrow, if all goes well.

I will keep things simple for now and just say that this is the first goal I am working on. Until tomorrow, I bid you all a good night!

MTV inspriation?

Yes, you read the title correctly. I was recently watching a show that was hosted by the MTV network. Nope, it is not the old MTV with just music videos. The current, teenage t.v. drama that airs every season. It is about a girl that blogs daily about her musings and we, the audience gets to see how her thoughts play out. It seems odd and boring or just uninteresting, but just hear out my thoughts. I will continue with the synopsis of the said show...

It starts with the social outcast acknowledging she, in fact, is the social outcast of not just her school, but her community. She ends up receiving a nasty letter telling her she should disappear because she is that much of a nobody. What the villain did not anticipate was taking the advice that followed after such a nasty statement. The letter told her if she disappeared no one would notice and that she should follow the list given to her in the letter. Now, the main character is taking charge of her life and blogging about it. But it sorts out her thoughts and she explains why she hates high school but not herself (necessarily). Again, I know it is a stupid teen drama but it made me think of something that has inspired me a bit.

In one episode, she figured out that a popular guy liked her because she decided to be herself and act least act like she didn't care (even though through all her musings, she very much did). It made me think about a lot of things. My ramblings don't ever really make sense...at least not to anyone else. But I am pretty sure that I don't care anymore.

I want to write blogs just to sort out my thoughts and figure out life. It has been super confusing recently and I know how I want to approach it. However, I feel it is far too complicated to try and explain what is going through my mind at the moment. Although that does contradict my goal. All I am going to divulge for now is that there is a big chance that you will see a new blog post everyday this week.

Things Are Looking Up?

I know that Friday's blog was kind of depressing. I think things are going to get better though. I have been working on my resume and caught a huge mistake on it! Hopefully, this will help me set things right by getting a job! I know that there are a few grocery stores hiring and (hopefully) with my previous experience in a grocery store I can find a steady job. Jamie says BlueHost is hiring for part-time positions too! I will be speaking with her tomorrow! I am actually rather excited to start working again. No I am not giving up Springville yet. I am trying to sort through some of thoughts about Springville which I will address in a different blog.

I am so close to getting my room in order and potentially having the storage area in the house close to being free of my stuff (well, most of my stuff). I get some distractions, such as homework (okay so it is not a distraction) and the prospect of a new job but other than that I feel I am just plugging away.

I hope to have my Summer schedule and Fall schedule planned out soon too! I plan on posting a lot in the next few days! I feel okay at the moment.

How to Discipline Me

I will not go into the details about everything that happened, but I did do something very wrong that hurt a lot of people in recent times. Now, most people would think that the best way to discipline me is to have me go through a consequences. I have interesting information...I will take my consequence but I am so hard on myself when I make a mistake.

When I was in drum corp, there were a lot of rules. Leave your dot book on the field and you have to run five laps around the field. Leave your equipment at a show and it goes everywhere with you...literally (you have to sleep with it too). If you leave pages of your dot book on your field and don't replace or update it then you do kitchen duty. I am pretty sure me and a few other rookies at the time broke every single rule (unintentionally, of course). Whenever, we broke these rules the other rookies would get extremely angry saying that they thought the punishments were unfair. Not me. I take my punishment, but it is the feeling that I disappointed someone that makes me upset. I had a staff member tell me for 10 minutes how much he was disappointment in me because he was always fighting for me to have a solo or be in a certain part of the show. I carried that around with me for a long time.

Needless, to say, I am a weird child. About 90% of the time, I will take my punishment and spend quite a long time wallowing in the fact that I disappointed someone. That is what I feel like right now...a disappointment to a lot of people. I am trying to do what I can to fix this, including a contract that I hope and pray a few people accept.

So, to those I have recently, or ever, hurt I really do apologize even if it doesn't seem like I was sorry at the time. I am trying to fix what I did and am hoping and praying that the people involved will accept my apology and accept my way of fixing things.

My Daylight Savings Story

Last night, my students had a competition. I didn't get home until late because it was not in Utah County. After making sure all of the kids had a ride home, I headed home. My car clock and cell phone were telling me it was 12:40am. When I did get home, I went upstairs to inform my mother that I was finally home. I looked at her clock and noticed it read as being 1:40am. This confused me quite a bit and I wanted to double check my cell phone clock and it still read as 12:40am so I thought the clock was incorrect. I went downstairs and went to bed. I woke up and noticed my phone flashing as 9:40am. Thinking I slept until almost 10am I went upstairs to eat some breakfast and noticed the stove clock read as 8:42am. I was extremely confused and couldn't figure out what was going on. 10 minutes later when I opened up the refrigerator to get some milk, I noticed the calendar on the refrigerator had said "March 11th-Day Light Savings Begins." Needless to say, I was thoroughly confused for quite a while and forgot it was Daylight Savings.

Going against my better judgement

I found out today that the band teacher is expecting me to re-gain her trust and the trust of the parents, not the students. But that goes against my better judgement. I have been taught to try and please the parents as much as I can while allowing the students to have fun and if they have fun but a parent is angry then that is their deal.

But I am being against to go against my better judgment. Okay. I just hope people know what they are asking for.

What None of Them Realize

What none of my students realize is how much I love and care about them. I cried quite a bit yesterday when a student accused me of not caring about my kids. Then when my student this morning threw her stuff down and walked out swearing while doing so. This mornings schedule including getting new work to the end of the show. When I went to set everyone up, one of my former captain's threw her equipment down and said (note there is swearing coming) "this is complete and total bull shit. When you and your lazy ass want to present a show that I am not embarrassed to perform you call me and tell me. Until then I am gone. I practiced and we were still messy. Thanks for making ME look ridiculous. If we weren't ready why did you put us out there. Call me when you have stuff for me to work on." I told her she has no idea what we are doing next and that in fact we were re-working the show today. She looked at me and said "Stop lying to me and tell me the truth. The music skipping was your irresponsible excuse to not have us be together and to throw us off. It is not MY fault or anyone else's fault we were messy on Saturday. Just yours. BYE NOW."

I had decided that I had had it with her attitude and told her the following "Fine. Leave and when your are ready to apologize for acting out of line, yelling and screaming and for disrespect to the team, you may come back. Until then, there is the door. You are excused!" She picked up her stuff and stomped out only to turn around and tell her best friend "You better pick the right side or we are not talking anymore." Her best friend followed her out. But that was not the end of it. I was staging the end of the show when some parents came up. No warning. Just a simple surrounding and a "we are not leaving until you talk to us." One of them is upset her daughter was cut as a captain for her attitude. Another was angry that the show was a mess on Saturday. A third did not say anything but rather was there because these parents were trying to have a strength in numbers situation. I finally told them the following "Look, you can make an appointment to talk with me after rehearsal. If you want Ms. Teot present you can make the appointment with her as well. I will not tolerate an interruption of rehearsal because you are upset. Either meet me downstairs or send me an email. I have work to do."

I think my favorite part is when Jamie Teot, the band teacher came up to me to have a chat with me. She noted the parents were angry and gave me suggestions on how to work with them. I was about to cry from stress so I instructed the rest of my kids to go over the flag feature phrase. That is when the trouble really began. My former captain came back and said she was going to be helping. From what I have gathered from the kids, they were yelled at by her and told to do what SHE said and not what I said because Jamie is my boss and if Jamie tells her (former captain) to run rehearsal then Jamie trumps Kristen and she (former captain) is allowed to do what she wants. Apparently afterwards, everyone got into it with each other.

Now, I have been receiving text messages non-stop about how the band teacher has decided to re-instate captains and how the students are not happy that the band director is making decisions for me.

I don't think any of them realize how much I love each and everyone of them, how much I want the best for them and if I had known they were not ready, I wouldn't have had them perform. They were clean in warm-up and in our Thursday rehearsal. They gave me every reason to believe they were prepared. I apologize if they felt I was the reason for them being so messy (sometimes apologizing for something you didn't do goes a long way). None of the kids had any resentment (aside from the usual two). They said they froze but that they were just not expecting so many people to watch them. They trust my judgement and plan to continue moving forward.

They don't realize that I care so much more about them then they know. I spend many nights laying in bed thinking how I can help them get better and how I can do my best for them. I have had times when I would wake up at three in the morning and choreography in my room a certain section and then write out how to help them achieve it!

I just wish they would realize that!

Nothing like a Mother's Love

I had an interesting experience today. I was eating at the Valley View Room (UVU's upscale cafeteria) and sat across from a family. There were four girls, a little boy and their mother. She was a single mom (she had a pamphlet for financial aid for single mom's) and was sharing food with all her kids. They couldn't afford cookies (they were asking why they couldn't have cookies and their mom simply said "because it is too much money and I don't know if I could buy enough for all of you"). The UVU student council walked around with fortune cookies and came by the table to give this struggling family a giant handful of them! I had gotten one earlier and knew exactly what each of them said. They were all the same. This is where the children's mom worked what I call "mommy's magic." Each child happily opened their cookie and then squealed in delight to find a paper with words in there. They each took turns asking their mom what it said. She started with her oldest and said "You pigtails make you look beautiful." Her oldest smiled big as her mom looked shocked and said "Whoa how did they know that!?" She continued give similar comments to her children about their beauty and how much they are loved each having three fortune cookies read to them, each squealing with delight (including her little boy).  She then told each of her children that it was time to go because she had to drop them off at the UVU Wee Care Center so she could go to class.

It made me think about their situation. The whole time her kids were noisy or asking questions that would make anyone feel uncomfortable to answer, she would answer calmly. She expressed her love to her kids despite her hardship. She did not look tired and even looked hopefully when she mentioned class. This woman knows what trials are and knows how to deal with them. She faces challenges everyday and still was calm and collect. She loved her children and you could tell that is all that mattered to her...that her children were happy. I see that kind of thing everyday but for some reason I had to share this wonderful experience. It made my challenges look a little more manageable!